Oh you know, explosions and stuff

Has your world ever exploded? And not in a spontaneous combustion kind of way, but more of a "woah life makes sense and might have purpose!" kind of way? Because mine has recently and it's as if everything is spontaneously combusting because I am freaking out. So, informative backstory for anyone who cares: I always liked science and did well in science classes, but never really considered science as a possible career simply because I thought I wasn't smart enough. And then I came across a lovely, relatively simple (NOT) class called physics. Even though math isn't really my "thing", as some might say, I migrated towards sciences that were more math related (chemistry over biology). Despite that, knowing that physics was a math intensive course was enough to make me fear it. After much internal debate, I decided to take it because having three years of lab science would make me more competitive for college. Yes, this act is quite small minded and somewhat pessimistic (for lack of a better word), but if being competitive for college had been drilled into your head since the age of eleven, you would've done the same thing. So the school year started and I was SLAPPED IN THE FACE with knowledge of things I had never even thought about before. Like why the hell do I fall when I lean forward? Or why, when the car goes forward, are we pushed back? And why is it that my hair repels itself when I rub a balloon on it? Physics was f-ing hard. IS f-ing hard. But it is also magic. And let me tell you, from a Harry Potter fanatic's viewpoint, MAGIC IS FUCKING INSANE. And scary. And Amazing. My views in physics have followed this pattern throughout the year. First, it was insane. No, I was insane for taking it. Then it was scary-I had many sleepless nights hiding from the forces in my room. I mean physics was the bane of my existence. And that's a very rude pun because physics literally is the bane of the existence of anyone who does not die from natural causes. And then, it was amazing. I started to see things in the world that had always been there, but I had been blind too. Falling while trying to teach myself how to skateboard didn't hurt so much when I was too busy assessing the forces that caused my fall, and applying Newton's First Law of Gravity. I almost feel safer in the world now, like now I have the means by which to understand what's going on. And I love the fact that there is still so much to learn. That doesn't mean I still don't think I'm smart enough to do physics. Because that definitely still applies. But I don't really care anymore, because the urge to learn is so much stronger than my self doubt. And that's insane. And scary. And amazing.

So I guess a lesson to take from all this is take any class you can, especially the ones you don't think you'll like, because the world truly is magical. And you never know what will make you see the magic.